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A rough draft of the spiritual autobiography of Joseph B Wilson. The history that lead to Toteg Tribe.
Copyright 2003 by Joseph B Wilson
- Sitting cross legged on the top of that mountain was a very old person, so old and so wrinkled that
I could not tell if it was a man or a woman. S/He looked at me and smiled and made a motion with
his hand and I just sat there for a while in his presence. Then I knew it was time to go. I got up and
kind of bowed a little, then turned and followed the path back down the mountain, to the boat, got in
the boat and floated back upriver to the grove of trees, tied the boat to the same tree, and began
following the path along the river back through the plane.
About in the middle of the plane I turned and looked back at the mountain I had been on. About this
time I noticed some movement, and suddenly there stepped onto the path a huge bear raring up
on his hind legs and roaring. In the surrounding area I could see there was about a half dozen other
bears. The huge bear began walking and roaring towards me and I looked up and saw very clearly
that old person sitting on top of the mountain. The Old One took a deep breath and blew very hard
on the bear and the huge bear seemed to fly through the air and into my chest and heart. I felt very
strong, and revitalized.
I turned and walked along the path again, coming back to my entrance to the other world, and as I
did so the words and monotonous tune to a song formed in my head "Old One, give me power,
Old One give me spirit, Old One blow on me. Old one blow on me."
I came back to the cave, and followed it back up the same way I'd gone down, and then sat up just
as the tape stopped drumming. I took the rattles and, as Harner suggested, gave them four sharp
shakes to end the experience.
I was impressed.
I did two more journeys after that first eventful one, both times going back to the top of that
mountain where I sat with my Old One. I can't say that we talked, because there were no words, but
there was communication and I feel like I came away with knowledge that I either didn't have, or
didn't know I had, before.
About a week later I introduced the concept, and Harner's book at a TOTEG circle. The folks who
were there were interested in it and so we began modifying the way we did our circles. People
asked me to "Retrieve their 'Power Animal'" for them, and so for the next three meetings that's all I
did. Someone else drummed for me, and I followed the instructions in Harner's book, laying the
person I was working for in the center of the circle, and dancing around them until I was exhausted,
then lay down beside them my left upper arm pressing against their left upper arm, my left hip and
thigh pressing against their left hip and thigh, and so forth. These times, instead of dancing naked
like I did alone, I wore a black loincloth in order to keep my thing-a-ma-bob from bob bob bobbing
around too much.
One thing I found interesting was that with each different person I entered the Lowerworld through a
different entrance and found myself in a different landscape than when I journeyed on my own. I
took to carrying a small quartz crystal in my mouth when I journeyed for them, and used it to carry
their "Power Animal" back to this world. When I blew the power into their chest, as per Harner's
instructions, I blew out the crystal onto them and held it there, giving it to them as a gift after the
ceremony was completed.
I've been putting "Power Animal" in quotations because this is one area where I think Harner
imported too much from his Peruvian sources. Yes, in many cases the spirit takes the form of an
animal, but not always. I think a more accurate word for it would be Tutelary (Guardian/Protector)
Spirit -but in those days I didn't know.
There were only 6 or 7 of us at the time, which was good, because I was getting tired! After I'd
made the journey for everyone, we began encouraging each person to journey themselves. We did
several circles where that's all we did - make journeys to the Lowerworld and explore, then when
we returned to our ordinary state of consciousness told the others what we experienced. We tape-
recorded our stories, and later I typed them up and put them in our internal newsletter.
At first we took turns drumming for the circle so one person didn't get tired all the time, but
unfortunately drumming for an extended period of time is difficult, and so I eventually took over
doing all the drumming for these group journeys. We didn't set a particular return time, but people
would go on their journey, and return on their own, and when they returned, sit up. When the last
person sat up, I'd finish the drumming and we would finish the circle.
We began group journeying with a purpose, exploring different areas of the Otherworlds, making
specific journeys to each direction, East, South, West, and North to meet the spirits that we might
find there and learn from them.
Eventually we evolved a complete ceremony to do. Sometimes everyone would use their rattles
and other percussion instruments while I was drumming on the main drum! The sound was
absolutely Enchanting!
